Think of Happy Happy Thoughts

April 1, 2008 - Posted by emelda

Happy thoughts,happy thoughts…common Mel you can do it….happy thoughts,happy thoughts…positive, be positive…Arg!! Why is it so hard to do so…fish!!!

Yep, that is what i have been telling myself for the past few weeks. But no matter how hard i try, i always crumbled down with all this stupid things happening around me now… FISH!

Arg, sometimes i wish i was not here..this is just a dream..nightmares that when i wake up i will be alright. NOOOOOOO but this is reality… i am feeling really down right now.. Nothing that i do pleases me anymore, everything is just so negative now,FISH HEAD!!!

Sometimes i wish i could just cry out loud and scream on top of my lungs… let it all out and hoping after that someone would pick me up and tell me everything is over..everything is fine now.

Argggg…times like this i wish im not in KL, i wish im with my family back home. But i know, even if im there nothing would change,i still have to face it..face the truth and the reality..that life is ain’t that rosy all the time..

I wish i can let everything out here…every single things that bugs me ..every single details of it..but that is impossible. Being me,where i am,who i am…i have to think all of that..not that i’m a superstar..but if i ever said it out..rumors will just go flying high and to covers people mouth is harder than to switch the lights off..and that is the last thing i want to have at the moment..if that ever happen, it will just make things worse for me and to some i don’t think you will ever believe me if i tell you anyway… i hate it when people say..really? Doesn’t look like it though…well let me ask you this,do you live my life? Who are you to say that? Did you went through “this” with me? Arg…i hate those replies…

Sigh….im tired, im emotionally,mentally and physically tired…tired of all this CRAP! Wish i have time machine to turn back time…or maybe something that could erased all this stuff out of my mind and just leave me with my happy thoughts..but again that is IMPOSSIBLE!

Oh dear, i hope i still could see the lights at the end of the tunnel….sometimes i feel like giving up!

SIGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH……

” God is listening and will always be there for you Mel…Be strong like how you have been always..you are a strong woman”

Courage, it would seem, is nothing less than the power to overcome danger, misfortune, fear, injustice, while continuing to affirm inwardly that life with all its sorrows is good; that everything is meaningful even if in a sense beyond our understanding; and that there is always tomorrow.~Dorothy Thompson

“She has a choice.  She can either accept a life of misery or she can struggle against it.  And she chooses to struggle…she fails in the end but there’s something beautiful and even heroic in her rebellion.” ~Kate Winslet

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This entry was posted on Tuesday, April 1st, 2008 at 10:19 pm and is filed under Personal, Thought. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

10 Comments

  1. iamikel says:

    *scratch head*

    something happened??

    [Reply]

    ... on July April 1st, 2008
  2. ethel says:

    Some kind of April Fool?
    Hmm..?

    [Reply]

    ... on July April 2nd, 2008
  3. emelda says:

    iamikel-Something has happen and happening now..

    Ethel- I wish this is April fool enrty moi…but no…:(

    [Reply]

    ... on July April 2nd, 2008
  4. massy says:

    well wutever it is, i hope u feel better *hugs

    [Reply]

    ... on July April 2nd, 2008
  5. Nick Phillips says:

    No matter how tough things seem to be at times, there’s always a way round it so hang in there. I’m sure things will look up soon.

    [Reply]

    ... on July April 2nd, 2008
  6. chegu carol says:

    I’m sure the silver lining will come next.
    Tough times will never stay forever. You know that right dear. :)

    Chin up! I’m sure that’s how you’d do.

    [Reply]

    ... on July April 2nd, 2008
  7. Ratu Syura says:

    Just remember that God will never give you a hard time if He knows it’s impossible for you to overcome it. I’m sure this is one of those life lessons you’ll be grateful for in the end. Remember what doesn’t kill you, will only make you stronger.. My favorite motto in life.. :)

    [Reply]

    ... on July April 2nd, 2008
  8. JACQ says:

    Okay what happened gurl?? Just be strong ya. Hopefully you’ll feel better soon..

    [Reply]

    ... on July April 3rd, 2008
  9. Nessa says:

    There are countless times I wanted to write something like this, but always end up deleting my posts! It’s tough not being able to really say what I really want to say…

    At the end of the day, I just tell myself… things will be OK :) Mo kasi senang hati bah…

    [Reply]

    ... on July April 7th, 2008
  10. emelda says:

    massy- Thanks Massy. :D

    Nick Phillips- True, things will turn around soon but going through it all alone is so tough sometimes. :(

    chegu carol-I hope so too…good thing will turn up soon.

    Ratu Syura-Yup,true things that doesn’t kill me will only make me stronger and i hope wiser too next time :D Thanks moi.

    JACQ-I will,I will be ok soon…just that going through it now makes me feel sick!

    Nessa-Yup,it was not easy for me too..tapi kan i have to do it…before sia go into depression. :( You should try..it makes you feel better cause you know at the end of the day,masih ada juga yg care about you..it’s always nice to have people telling you positive stuff and look at the bright side sometimes we just need that..someone to tell you everything will be ok soon. :D

    [Reply]

    ... on July April 7th, 2008

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