Kadazan Bonita

2009 story part 2

Posted on 25. Nov, 2009 by emelda in Personal, couple, emotional, feelings, ramblling

As promised

Although the manager was really nice to by offering me the job.. i turned it down at the end of the day. It is definitely not because i was so malu-fied by my car incident.. but i got a better job offer like i said,  i got 3 job offers in line remember?? . That was when i came back to the fitness industry. The pay was similar to what i was being offered at the first job offer ( where my car was nearly towed away) maybe even more by end of the month actually becuuase it was a sales industry.. but i don’t dare to take the challenge to be sales person again.. after i think i failed miserably on my second job outside of fitness industry…LOL! ( tinting consultant)

So June was the mark of my life changing to a better life.. no it was not rosy straight away, i have so much baggage carried on my shoulder from the pass 1 year half.. all those bad things that happen to me really made me scared of what’s gonna happen next and that was my relationship that i was worried about. You see, like i said..Dan and i went through bad patch, really bad patch that made me think.. is it worth it? Should i really continue with this?

And then something happen.. i was sent to Jakarta for month for work.. all that time when we had our bad patch.. all i ever wanted was to be away from Daniel.. a time for myself to think about what i really want in my life and my relationship and of cos to give Dan some space of his own to think things through.  That was a good 1 month break from each other…

When i was away from him, i tried not to think about him, care about him and worried about him.. but that’s what exactly took place when i was in JKT… i miss him. I miss his jokes, his morning kisses, his morning perfume smell.. just him being him and around me. I miss that.. but of cos, i never really admitted that to him.. i let me ego do the talking. I was hurt and still bitter with whatever happen the past few months before…the argument we go through was too much for me.. i believe it was too much for him too.. for us to be arguing like there is no tmrw. At one point, i even asked him to call our engagement OFF!  Yes, i was that upset.. but i know.. deep down that’s not what i really wanted and i thank God that he did not listen to my crazy self talking .. Dan never gave up on us. Instead he was there for me.

July came.. that was the month that made me nervous like hell!! July was the month we got engaged …

As some of you might already know now, kadazadusun  has so much of adat resam when it comes to engagement or wedding or any big celebration.and that’s one of the main reason why i was nervous. I was so worried that Dan’s parent could not take the ” rules and regulation”  that the night before our engagement day..nerve build up….Dan and i had a small disagreement .. and trust me that did not help me at all.. hahah i was not able to sleep well the night before the engagment day. The morning came..i tell you… it was a nerve wrecking for me… seeing and listening to both parents talking and discussing .. ohhhhh… did not do me any good. The whole time when they were doing the talk.. the “adult talk” they called it, i was so nervous nasib la sia inda sampai pi ambil Medicare supplement plan, lol! …I believe Dan was nervous too… heheheeh   ” I won’t tell them my love, your secret safe with me ”

I was only able to smile, relax and enjoy my engagement day after the ring exchanging ceremony… hahahhahaha.. yes me being silly and worrying so much for no reason.. i should have listened and trust Daniel that everything will be ok.. i won’t go through the moment of torturing myself and be nervous isn’t it?? I am sure the video that was taken by Dan’s uncle will be a proved of me being nervous…hahaha.. i hope he won’t show that during our wedding day.. malu eh!

Picture on our engagement day

To be continue again…..

Tags: couple, emotional, engagement, kadazadusun, parents