July 11th, 2008 by emelda

How true…:(

April 18th, 2008 by emelda

Keluarga saya

Semua orang di dunia ini ada keluarga.Keluarga adalah family dalam bahasa orang putih.Keluarga mempunyai ayah ,ibu,abang,kakak,adek,nenek,datuk,pakcik,makcik dan etc,etc.

Pertama kali ingin saya memberitahu,bahawa semua orang di dunia ini mempunyai keluarga aman damai dan tidak berperang tetapi ada juga yang tidak aman damai kerana mereka berperang.

Saya ingin menceritakan pula tentang keluarga saya.Saya mempunyai seorang ibu dan ayah.Tetapi ibu saya kata dia pernah tidur dengan tiga orang lelaki di hotel mana dengan itu sah bahawa saya ini anak luar nikah kerana darah saya berlain jenis dengan ayah saya yang ada di rumah ini.

Ayah tidak peduli bila ibu keluar dengan lelaki lain.Ibu pula tidak risau jika ayah tidak pulang ke rumah walaupun hampir satu bulan.

Kakak dan abang saya tidak lagi bersekolah kerana mereka sudah berhenti.Kakak saya cantik seperti mirip wajah marilyn monroe yang sudah mati itu.Dia mati kerana terlanggar motor datuk saya yang enjinnya berkuasa 500cc.

Abang saya handsome ataupun kacak seperti Amitabh Bachan atau Sunjay Dutt.Kadang2 muka dia berubah seperti Acappan bila dia baru bangun tidur.Bila dia habis mandi,muka dia macam muka dia sendiri.Itulah kelebihan abang saya.

Seterusnya,saya menceritakan tentang adik saya.Walaupun saya tidak ada adik tetapi saya tipu kamu dengan mengatakan saya ada adik.

Demikianlah cerita tentang keluarga saya bahagia walaupun sebenarnya tidak. Sekian Harap maklum.

Yang Ikhlas,

BOB.

OH MY GOODNESS!! I can’t stop laughing reading this essay!!!!

Chegu Carol,macam mana pening sudah kepala kau baca ini essay?

March 6th, 2008 by emelda

Yesterday, i bought Malay Mail newspaper just for me to read while having my lunch break( was all alone, how sad). And i found few interesting topics and not to mention funny at the same time…example:

BIG BREAST WIN COURT VERDICT!!

That was the headline no joke!You don’t get to see this kind of headline in STAR newspaper. That’s why i prefer malay mail…:) as my companion over lunch always!

“A japanese pin-up model says that her breast have not only boosted her career- they also helped her overturn  a court verdict. In her appeal,the defense counsel help up a plate showing the size of the hole and said that she could not squeeze through it with her 110cm BUST!

The judges were good mannered as they showed no expression on their faces. I guess they’re well-trained. Said the Model.”

Holy molly!! 110cm BUST?????Anyone have measuring tape here??  Judges were good mannered?? You are joking me… I think they are too engrossed looking at it gurl! It’s huge! What talking you??

Japanese Firm: Drinks are on us.

“Boozing into the night might inhibit coherent speech,but a Japaneses company bets it will make workers communicate better and it’s willing to pay for it.

The company plans to offer managers who supervise 20 or more people up tp 300,000 Yen ( Rm9,289) a month and manager with fewer than 20 workers will get 200,000 yen. After-hours drinking is encourage in Japanese corporate culture as a way to break ice in work environments that can be uptight and formal.”

Hmmm..i guess Daniel old entry did came true huh??

Wonder when Malaysian corporate culture will embrace this. Can you imagine what will happen by then? Hmmm..

March 3rd, 2008 by emelda

I have few questions to ask you reader.  I would love to hear from you..:D

1) Do you think women and men can ever be best friend without having any romantic feeling involve?

2) What is the different between best friend,close friend and good friend?

3) Do you brush your teeth before breakfast or after breakfast?

4) If  God give you a special gift,what would it be?

5) If you only have one minute in the world, what do you want to do with it?

6)What is the best thing that ever happen in your life?

7) what do you think about man who does pedicure and manicure?

8)What is your most ideal romantic holiday?

9)Money,freedom and friendship, which one will you choose?

10)How often do you lie to your partner?

February 28th, 2008 by emelda

LOL!! Klang banjir yesterday…LOL!!! I find it’s funny as i never experience banjir in KL and what more my office area… Wo hooo!!

But i was really lucky as i get to go home without getting stranded anywhere…this prove to you all..kereta kecil doesn’t mean it’s a lousy car ok!

Anyway,here is some of the photo that i managed to take yesterday.

That’s how the sky looked like yesterday…

And this is Klang toll yesterday…hehehehe

After the rain ….don’t you think it’s beautiful? So blue …

Oh well, i came home with half of our living room and my poor doggie soaking wet!!! Arg, and i also found out one of my flower senget and half of the root came off from the soil. :(…sob sob….

I left the balcony door ajar( normal practice for us) as gummi cage is placed next to our balcony door.

Bleh! More work at home……sapu,mop and bathing gummi….AGAIN! DUH!

February 14th, 2008 by emelda

A colleague of mine told us this story.

Today (14th Feb 08) while driving down at the LDP road at kelana Jaya she saw this big billboard saying…

KELLY,WOULD YOU MARRY ME???(Err i think that’s the girl’s name)Apparently,the guy even took a photo of him holding a wedding ring box!

Soooooooo sweet and romantic!!! But i think it will be even better if he did include the girl photo. Don’t you think so??

I wonder how deep was his pocket burned after all that? And man, the girl must be super ecstatic and the happiest girl in town now!! I just hope when she see this billboard,she won’t do an emergency break cos too terkejut!! 

Ah…some people are just lucky!

So did any of you see this billboard?? “Let’s hope it is not an advertisement board” 

P/s: I told Daniel, one day if we ever get that much amount of money and he wants to propose to me the same way… he better put my picture up too cause i want to get out of my car and stand there and scream “THAT’S ME,THAT’S ME”!!!

Hey,i never get a chance to see my face on a billboard k! So why not??

February 13th, 2008 by emelda

1. Maternity leave would last two years….with full pay.

2. There would be a cure for stretch marks.

3. Natural childbirth would become obsolete.

4. Morning sickness would rank as the nation’s #1 health problem.

5. All methods of birth control would be 100% effective.

6. Children would be kept in the hospital until toilet trained.

7. Men would be eager to talk about commitment.

8. They wouldn’t think twins were so cute.

9. Sons would have to be home from dates by 10:00 PM.

10. Briefcases would be used as diaper bags.

11. Paternity suits would be a fashion line of clothes.

12. They’d stay in bed during the entire pregnancy.

13. Restaurants would include ice cream and pickles as main entrees.

14. Women would rule the world.

January 11th, 2008 by emelda

1. Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
2. Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible. In a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle.
3. Men are very confident people. My other half is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they’re really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.
4. Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.
5. Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.
6. All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. So sleep with one under the pillow instead of a gun.
7. All men hate to hear “We need to talk about our relationship.” These seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwarzkopf.
8. Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log does not burn, he will take it personally.
9. If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, he is serious.
10. Most women are introspective: “Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?” Most men are outrospective: “Did my team win? How’s my car?”
11. If a man says, “I’ll call you,” and he doesn’t, he didn’t forget… he didn’t lose your number… he didn’t die. He just didn’t want to call you.
12. Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem. “Get out” and “I never want to see you again” might sound like a challenge. If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, “I love you… I want to marry you… I want to have your children.” Sometimes they leave skid marks.
13. Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause - you get to date young girls and drive motorcycles.
14. Men forget everything; women remember everything.
15. That’s why men need instant replays in sports. They’ve already forgotten what happened

October 26th, 2007 by emelda

October 25th, 2007 by emelda

Dear Wife:

I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good man to you for seven years, and I have nothing
to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today, and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn’t even notice that I had gotten a new hair cut, cooked your favorite meal, and even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You came home and ate in two minutes, then went straight to sleep after watching all your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore, you don’t want to have sex anymore or anything. Either you’re cheating on me or
you don’t love me anymore. Whatever the case is, I am gone.

Your EX - Husband

P.S. Don’t try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving away to
West Virginia together! Have a great life!

Dear Ex-Husband:

Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It is true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much
because they drown out your constant whining and griping. Too bad that doesn’t work. I did notice when you got a hair cut last week. The first thing that came to mind was, “You look just like a girl!”, but my mother raised me not to say anything, if you can’t say anything nice. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating steak seven years ago. I turned away from you when you had those silk boxers on because the price tag was still on them. I prayed that it was just a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your new silk boxers were $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So, when I discovered that I had hit the lottery for Ten Million Dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica . But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that with your letter you wrote, you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.

Signed,
Rich and Free!

P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this but Carla, my sister, was born CARL. I hope that’s not a problem.

Change is good.

Mel: LOL!!!!!